Charges Dropped Against Joseph Arcidiacono for Throwing White Claw at Ted Cruz

On a cold January 9th, 2023 morning, the Houston grand jury took everyone by surprise with their decision to drop all felony charges against Joseph Arcidiacono for his White Claw hard seltzer can throwing incident at Republican Senator Ted Cruz during an Astros World Series victory parade.

The incident originally occurred on November 7th, 2022, when Senator Cruz found himself cruising in a Humvee as part of the festivities until two cans were hurtled his way. Fortunately, he emerged unscathed with only minor and superficial wounds. Instead of anguish, all present found themselves in fits of laughter while the Senator himself joked about the situation and then heartily grabbed a can of White Claw for himself.

Reporters have spoken with Arcidiacono’s attorney, Bill Stradley, who noted that his client had no intention of executing any political act of violence. Instead, he only wanted to show admiration and appreciation towards the Astros players by throwing them drinks from his cooler as an act of festive celebration, an act which was quickly misinterpreted by security personnel in attendance.

The 33-year-old also sent a text message to one of his friends on the eve of the parade expressing how it would be “epic” if he could throw drinks at one of the players.

After being held on $40,000 bond with a GPS ankle monitor and the command to keep away from the Senator’s workplace and residence, Arcidiacono was released. Fortunately, it didn’t take long for the 182nd District Court to dismiss his case since there wasn’t enough evidence against him.

Senator Cruz has yet to respond about the grand jury’s decision. But Arcidiacono’s lawyer declared in a statement that it was an Astros supporter who attempted to pour drinks from his cooler into the Senator during Houston’s championship parade. Stradley added that he didn’t understand how this could be misinterpreted until security responded harshly.

Stradley issued an apology on behalf of Arcidiacono, seeking Cruz’s forgiveness. This occurrence has fostered a heated conversation about whether this indiscretion was just careless or if there was some kind of political agenda behind it. Some suggest that perhaps it could have been seen as a protest against Cruz’s stances and language, however others are adamant in believing this to be nothing more than a failed attempt at humor.

After the grand jury determined that there was not enough evidence to charge Arcidiacono with a felony, this strange incident has now concluded. It is still uncertain if Cruz will forgive and forget or simply ignore the apology offered by Arcidiacono. Nevertheless, it adds another layer of humor to an already memorable 2019 World Series victory parade celebration for the Houston Astros.

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